December 31, 2011

Why 2012 Is Going to Be Amazing

I'm worn out. Completely worn out. I'm not sure whether it's lack of sleep, dehydration or Nintendo thumb, but 2011 really beat me up. I have more aches in my bones than ever before and I'm pretty sure that the only one sleeping at naptime these days is me, dear old Dad. But that is all about to change.

I'm tired of being tired, so I'm dedicating 2012 to be the Year of Amazing. That's right my friends. I've looked into my crystal ball and have seen the future. This is going to be a banner year at Klems Manor where a lot of amazing things will happen—Ella will start kindergarten, Anna will start preschool, Mia will take her first steps, my wife will learn to love bacon. There will be many, many reasons to celebrate and I plan to celebrate them all.

Though, as I looked into that giant ball, I noticed my family members weren't the only ones who will do great things in the coming year. I saw 8 Amazing Things that this Dad is going to accomplish in 2012. Here they are:

1. I am going to lose 20 pounds.
For the sake of my health it's time to cut my Dorito intake in half, so I'll only be buying 3 bags a week. Sorry Frito-Lay.

2. I am going to run a half marathon. Stop laughing. (UPDATE: COMPLETED!)

3. I am going to take part in a flash mob. Would love to do the first ever "Dad Flash Mob" where Dads across the great city of Cincinnati break out in dance to Motownphilly by Boyz II Men. Why? The band name says it all. Plus, that song is awesome. Who's with me?

4. I am going to find a way so that all three of my kids can sit on my lap at the same time and get a photo with all three of them smiling at the same time AND with all our eyes open.
This, quite honestly, may be the most difficult item on this list.

5. I am going to read my kids The Little Prince.
My Mom read this to me at bedtime when I was just a little Brian, and it's one of her fondest memories. I want a fondest memory.

6. I am going to beat Andy Uhl in Scrabble.
I'm not even sure this is possible, but I'm going to spend the next 366 days (thank you leap year) trying to do it.

7. I am going to get rid of my blue sleeping pants that sport a giant hole in the crotch
(much to the chagrin of my wife, I'm sure). I never thought I'd see this day. All hope is not lost, though: I see a thread beginning to break free in the crotch of my red pair. (UPDATED: COMPLETED!)

8. I am going to pitch a Life of Dad book to agents and put myself out there.
If millions come rolling in, I'm throwing a party and you're all invited. So long as you use the code-word Forehead Hickey. (UPDATE: Phase 1 COMPLETED!; On to Phase 2 - Book Deal)

Come success or failure at any (all) of these, one thing is for certain: Life is short and there's no more time for putting off dreams. If I'm not constantly trying to reach goals, then what kind of example am I setting for my kids? A boring one. Which is why I'm glad I looked into that crystal ball and saw just how amazing my coming year is going to be. I hope you have an opportunity to look into yours and see what amazing things you are going to accomplish in the coming year.

And if what you see is you taking part in a Dad flash mob, let me know. I can help make that happen.


catyork said...

Yeah! Happy New Year, Brian! Your stories are a hoot and a half! I'm so glad you're going to pitch this book!
Keep 'em coming! Here's to 2012!

Jen Smith said...

Definitely pitch that book!

Happy New Years to you and yours, and here's to your Flash Mob being the next Youtube sensation!

Melanie said...

Please involve all of our male family members in the flash mob. I'll video. It will be amazing. And also I think it should be a MJ song.

Kara said...

One of my LIFE goals is to beat Andy in Scrabble. :) (That said, I imagine you're a much better Scrabble player than I am.) Also, SO EXCITED about the book. For what it's worth, I now get this when I talk about you: "Wait, is that the guy who writes the really funny blog?" I can't wait for you to sign a copy for me. :)

Woz said...

The first and only time I wish I was a guy...just to be in that flash mob.

ajcap said...

I'm with Woz, I would SO be in that flash mob.

Also, I would buy your book so get it out there. Forehead to write that down somewhere...

Kim Kane said...

Oh my God Brian...I second catyork's comment. Your stories are a hoot. I absolutely love reading these...keep writing.

Tonii said...

I'll take your challenge! My resolution is to finish the book I'm working on and pitch it.

Anonymous said...

If I can run a half-marathon, you can?! And I've done it twice. My advice is to get a running buddy, better yet, a running pack of people who make it fun to get out there. I've just heard of this book called "Born to Run" that you might enjoy. Once getting active outside a habit, and you will likely find Nintendo and Doritos less attractive, thus helping you achieve Resolution #1.Good luck!

Anonymous said...

I'll take up your challenge too: to write 2100 to 2500 words per week on my novel. (I have other writing stuff too hence it may seem a little low - but it's a heck of a lot more than I managed in 2010 where I completely failed to achieve my goal of completing it in first draft...all I managed was the prologue and chapter one!!!) Thanks for your amazing encouragement and inspiration on the weekly email from Writers Digest. Happy New Year.

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Anonymous said...

W.O.W. I hope this last guy or gal made a new years resolution to be nicer, because they suck at it.


Greetings Brian,

I love your resolutions and I wish you luck. AND if you wanna say CROTCH say it. I will say it with you...CROTCH! People like that kill me... I hope you have a great year.

Thundersbeard, Michael. said...

3 young kids so close together in age, sounds like your wife might already like the bacon ;)

Best place to write "forehead hickey" down, is (of course) your forehead.

Arpita Bhawal said...

Beautiful thoughts, Brian! :) Hope I get to "actively" chase some of my dreams too this year. Love your is so "real" - something people have forgotten to be in their lives these days! Have a great year.

desertrose said...

Brian I am a WD subscriber so I kinda know you. Love yr post...makes me smile